OK, this is just stupid.

Background, I sell cars for a living. Furthermore, I have about 4 long trail IPAs in my stomach and thought this was hilarious.

I do logistics for the tuskers, I bring in fully fit BCs for corp contracts, as well as a few modules as well as ammo placed on our home systems (hevrice) market.

[02:38:50] EVE System > Channel MOTD: The Tuskers Alts channel--TUSKER MEMBERS/ALTS ONLY!! Alts should be set blue, if not please contact Ka Jolo or a director ASAP. Non-blues subject to kick or ban.
Current Blues
--
Intelligence Reports

[04:12:10] Kaal Redrum > youre not being a good salesman ..
[04:12:16] GavriloPrincip > lol
[04:12:26] Kaal Redrum > better get your act together .. or else ..
[04:12:27] Aznwithbeard > seriously if its gunna be this slow i cant do this
[04:12:44] Aznwithbeard > last shipment was 15 bcs in under 24 hours, this shipment ive had 15 bcs for 6 days. lol
[04:13:13] Aznwithbeard > also, fuck u i sold grossed 6300 dollars in profit for my dealership today. haha
[04:13:16] Kaal Redrum > its christmas weekend ..
[04:14:05] GavriloPrincip > YESSSSSSS I MUST BUY A BC AND FLY IT OUT HERE
[04:15:10] GavriloPrincip > BOO YAH
[04:15:13] Aznwithbeard > LOOK AT THOSE MISSILE LAUNCHERS, FULLY STOCKED WITH AMMO, BRAND NEW SHIPS, NO REPACKAGED GARBAGE HERE, COMES WITH A LIFETIME WARRANTEE, PROVIDED ITS INSURED AND YOU DONT CARE THAT YOUR WARR. WILL ONLY COVER HALF THE COST.
[04:15:45] Kaal Redrum > now all you need is an inflatabale wavy hands thingy
[04:15:47] Aznwithbeard > CALDARI NOT YOUR THING? I HAVE HURRICANES JUST WAITING TO RIP APART NOOBS IN FRIGATES. YOUR CHOICE, ARTILLERY OR AUTOCANNON, ONLY 70 MILLION.
[04:16:01] Aznwithbeard > FUCK IT, ILL EVEN THROW AMMO IN THE HOLD, JUST FOR YOU.
[04:16:27] GavriloPrincip > Aznwithbeard the most reputable bearded salesman this side of Poitot
[04:17:24] Aznwithbeard > YOU LIKE RIGS? WE GOT RIGS! OUR BATTLECRUISERS COME FULLY FIT CUSTOM TO YOUR NEEDS. PROVIDED YOUR NEEDS INVOLVE KILLING. AND SHIELD TANKING. LOOK AT THOSE DAMAGE CONTROLS, I WENT TO JITA AND BOUGHT THE BEST DAMAGE CONTROLS I COULD FIND. ONLY THE BEST.
[04:18:34] Aznwithbeard > BUY A NICE CHRISTMAS GIFT FOR YOU AND YOURS. CHEAP CHEAP CHEAP CHEAP CHEAP. PRICES ONLY GOOD TIL LIKE, NOW! ok im done.
[04:18:35] GavriloPrincip > well im sold

CVA are STILL a bunch of pussies.

I decided to try my luck in good old Amarr lowsec, away from the FW, the hustle and bustle of the FW pipe near amamake, in  and around good old Misaba, where CVA lives. I check a few systems, Have a pilgrim jump into me, only to log off  as my drake stared at him, not even attempting to tackle.

I take land on another gate towards misaba and see a hurricane sitting there, I jump and he jumps after. I think EXCELLENT FIGHTTT, or a tarp, but other side is clear and I MWD away. The cane eventually uncloaks and (at least) yellowboxes me, but doesn't stray from the gate.

The pilgrim makes its way into system, and I find it on misaba station, as well as a drake, a stabber, and the hurricane pilot still in system.

Below is the chatlog from misaba local.  (anyone who gets the joke, thanks, it was lost on my corp and other player channels I am apart of)


[03:18:12] EVE System > Channel changed to Local : Misaba
[03:24:50] Aznwithbeard > FOR CRIMES AGAINST THE REPUBLIC, YOU HAVE BEEN TARGETED FOR TROLLOLING.
[03:26:49] Aznwithbeard > you guys are a wild bunch. legitimately.
[03:29:11] Aznwithbeard > all rape whistles and zimas.



Seriously, What a bunch of vagoos.

I flew a rifter?

So I had a few minutes only to actually be undocked, and someone comes into local and starts talking to a corpie of mine.

Seems hes itching for a fight and is in a rifter. I look around my hanger and find a big box spray painted "rifter", have my mechanic pop it open and out falls a bunch of rusty metal. Three minutes later and its assembled.... mostly.


I have crappy modules for frigates and have him install what I've got, some 200mm ACs, full tackle and an AB, a SAR, 200mm plate I stole off of one of Konigs frigates, and a damage control. No room for rigs, but its gunna be all gravy.

Very close fight with me holding the field at 51% structure, tackled the POD and invited him into the ransom channel.

[02:58:31] EVE System > Channel MOTD: Hello, one or more members of The Tuskers are prepared to destroy your vessel. Should you wish to pay a ransom to save your ship, please do the following immediately:

1. Turn off all modules (including guns, missile launchers, webbers, scrams, etc.) and recall all drones. Stop your ship.

2. From the time a ransom amount appears below, you will have 30 seconds to pay the amount specified. Right-click the picture of the pirate stating our demands and select "give money" to do this.

If you do not comply immediately, we will re-open fire on your vessel. If we get nervous for any reason we will re-open fire on your vessel.
Tuskers Ransom Board
[03:26:51] Plutonian > gf
[03:26:55] Aznwithbeard > tell me a joke and save ur pod :)
[03:27:03] Plutonian > Got a good one.
[03:27:23] Plutonian > A man finds his path barred by a wide lake.
[03:27:34] Plutonian > He looks to the other side and sees a blonde fishing.
[03:27:46] Plutonian > So he shouts... Hey!  How do I get to the other side?
[03:27:48] Plutonian > She says...
[03:27:56] Plutonian > You're already there!
[03:28:05] Aznwithbeard > lol, good stuff, good stuff.
[03:28:17] Aznwithbeard > ur free to go, whats in ur head if u dont mind me asking?
[03:29:04] Plutonian > Crap implants... two of them.  The ones worth about 1 mllion
[03:29:19] Plutonian > Not anywhere good enough to fly with the good stuff... yet.
[03:29:21] Aznwithbeard > haha, i figured id do a joke since ur sus's friend or something :)
[03:29:34] Aznwithbeard > erm, i think we had the same fit hahaha
[03:29:36] Plutonian > We were in Eve Uni together.
[03:29:42] Aznwithbeard > oo
[03:29:56] Plutonian > The lack of DC concerns me on it.
[03:30:14] Plutonian > Nice DPS, but not much staying power.
[03:30:18] Aznwithbeard > nah i was fit a bit differently
[03:30:46] Aznwithbeard > but in any case, good fight, thanks for the joke. come back if u want more practice!
[03:31:11] EVE System > Plutonian was kicked from the channel by Aznwithbeard
Effective until: 2011.12.23 04:01
Reason: "ransom paid"



Killmail here.

Afterthoughts:

I can't believe I won. I'm really terrible with frigates, hence I did not have one fit.  The 200s did alright, but I'd have prefered 150s and a nos. Was a very close fight, and I'm glad to see people still honor themselves by not bringing their alts (his was in system) to help them out.

I've been bad

I haven't posted inna while, I dont know if I actually have people looking at this blog, but like, I'll fix it!!!

Happy holidays to everyone.

Merry Christmas to me.